A Magical Moment
by CaptainCrash
Summary: John seeks advice from Tarot cards to deal with his new feelings. OneShot


**A/N: It's not perfect, but I hope you enjoy.**

A Magical Moment

I stepped over the threshold into the dimly lit corridor. The incensed air hung thickly and assaulted my senses. The sweet scent greeted me like a friend; hugging every pour that had been chilled from the winter chill. I nodded sheepishly to the woman I first meet. I'm careful not to make eye contact with her; I don't want to see the pity etched on her face. Yes; I was here again to try and get some answers.

I part with my money and take my usual seat in the corner of the small room that was lined with comfy chairs and sofas. I locate the incense that is burning on the table and instantly I know there's a headache on its way. I allowed myself to sink into the chair and willed my heart to slow down. I knew why it was hammering erratically; I'd lied to Sherlock and told him that I was having dinner with Sarah; he wouldn't understand. My heart skipped another beat at the thought of him but I pushed it aside.

Groups of people file in and take their seats. I place them into groups. It's clear who is new to this. Those people who believe and those who've been dragged along. I inwardly smile before Felix makes a start. He passes around eight piles of tarot cards and instructs everyone to take a card from each pile once they've shuffled it. It's a lengthy process and once I've taken mine I sit back once more and let the babble of noise wash over me while I assess my cards.

I take in all that's before me. I can make sense of them and assign some sort of meaning. Will it read on my face? Will I let anything slip? I know what Sherlock's opinion would be; but I believe. I believe that the soul passes on. I believe that people can contact the dead.

I believe.

It's about the only thing in my life that makes sense right now. It's the only thing that can bring peace to my busy mind. Perhaps it's the idea that I have no control in my life and it's all planned out that makes things easier to deal with.

I reshuffle the selection and place them on my good knee. The one card that could finally expose what I was here for burnt through my jeans. _Love Life_ was the heading spread of a pink background with a romantic scene illustrating society's concept of love. _Love, that is truly deserved, is waiting for you._

Society was more than accepting of the love I was feeling.

If only I could.

Felix, the generous psychic, had begun to do his rounds of the group readings. I phased in and out of other people's lives. Someone was told that they would be married within the year; another had news from a recently deceased family member. The room was almost empty by the time he came to me.

'Hello John.' Felix sat beside me and unburdened my lap of the cards. He paused to reflect upon the combination of cards; 'Someone is jealous of you.' He scratched at his beard fiercely. 'Of a connection or role you have with another person.' He reshuffled them. 'You all share a common enemy though; the one we spoke about before.'

Moriarty! We spoke about Moriarty last month. That does indeed limit those who would be jealous of me. I had instantly thought of Molly, but now I was thinking it was Mycroft. I had, after all, taken his brother away from him. I'd overheard Mycroft complaining to Sherlock on one of his many visits recently. Well, there was nothing I could do about that. I had no desire to remove Sherlock from my life; Mycroft would have to make do.

'Your grand mother is here John,' Felix hushed softly. 'You've recently split with someone?'

'Yes.' I agree. My love life is something that we'd never discussed so there was no way of him knowing whether I was single or taken. It had come out the blue for me. Sarah declared that she'd had enough; she was done being my beard. I'd asked for clarification; and that was when she 'outed' me; to me. She declared that I was in love with Sherlock. She wasn't angry; just disappointed.

'She's telling me that you've done the right thing; that Sarah wasn't the one for you.' Felix tells me and I try to shake off the fuzzy feeling I've gained since residing in the room. 'She was lacking...' he paused and contorted his face in confusion, 'meat and two veg for a start.'

I stifled a smirk as it dawned on Felix.

'Come on old man you're a psychic; you should have seen that one.' I place a soothing hand on his shoulder. 'You should have at least seen it coming before me. I would have liked a warning.'

'Some things are meant to be a surprise.' He informed me with a cryptic smile. 'You've been waiting for news about your love life haven't you?'

'I wanted to love Sarah!' I clutched my leg as it began to throb. 'I wanted you to tell me that was in the cards; to stop my distracting thoughts.' I sighed deeply. Confusion is best lived when you're a teenager, not middle-aged.

'Well now that you're honest with yourself, you are open to what the spirit world has to say.' He shuffled the cards once more. 'Stay true and honest to yourself and things will work out just fine. You're grandmother will always be proud of you. You've lived a heroic life and she couldn't wish for more.'

'Thank you.' I whisper and my heart lifts, before wondering if I should tell him how I feel.

'Don't tell him.' Felix informs me as if he could read my thoughts. My heart sinks; of course he wouldn't feel the same. 'Whoever it is; your grandmother is saying to leave it well alone. Love is coming your way; but you must stop looking.'

I wasn't looking; I thought I'd found it. _Damn._

I nod to acknowledge what was being said to me. Felix wishes me well before heading off to read another person. I wait a while; processing all that had been said to me, before gathering my things and heading out into the night.

He was waiting there, resting upon the telephone box two doors down, a smug smile curled on his face. How on earth did he do it?

'You know the more you go, the easier you are to read? The easier it is the con money out of you!' He intoned as I approached him. 'How much have you wasted so far? Beside your dignity and integrity of course!'

'You come all this way to be a prick?' I stuffed my hands roughly into my jacket pocket before walking away. A moment later, I feel him at my side.

'I don't understand-'

'-you very rarely do Sherlock!' I sigh; it was tiring trying to keep this pace up. There was no way I'd make it back to Baker Street like this. Sherlock is aware of this and pulls me to an abrupt stop. 'What?'

'You've been once a month, for the last six months. What can you possibly find out there that you can't deduce logically?' His hand remains on my shoulder while he spoke. It sent a fever right to my soul.

'I don't know. Love; I wanted to know if love was coming my way. Things have not been right for a while now. I'm lonely, I'm confused, I just wanted-'

'The coward's way out? You wanted someone to tell you how you should think, how you should feel; because you're too scared to figure it out for yourself?' He berated me. I stood; my mouth open to the chill of the night. 'I don't have to be psychic to tell you that you are loved John.'

'You can't know that!' I roar.

'John, I'm telling you; you are loved!' He clamped his hands to my face. 'You are loved by me.'


End file.
